We have audio of the demonic voice that haunted UFC 159. Listen at your own risk

Listen, I’m no expert, but I’m pretty sure we just heard a brief passage from the Necronomicon being read between round 1 and 2 of the Bisping/Belcher fight. We know you heard it too.

To confirm that what we heard was indeed the most evil of verses, I zipped up my hoodie and snuck into a sketchy basement filled with cobwebs and oversized candles after the show wrapped. It took some thorough research and close calls with the night watchman, but I found that the “Passages of The Dead” holds a spell that sounds almost exactly like what we heard tonight. I dug through Anton LaVey’s personal scrolls for a bit longer to confirm, then took a picture of the dusty text with my microcamera. I don’t think I ever would’ve made it out of there if not for my loyal dog and crew of fashionable friends.

Ladies and gentlemen, it could be that these are the words that were spoken through the UFC 159 airwaves. Could this be UFC 151 back from the grave?

The Conjuration “The Binding of the Evil Sorcerers”

Alsi ku nushi ilani mushiti

Itti kunu alsi mushitum kallatum kattumtum

Alsi bararitum qablitum u namaritum

Ashshu kashshaptu u kashshipanni

Eli nitum ubbiraanni

I’m scared. Here’s the voice for reference.

Thanks to Dubbers for capturing the voice of the demon.

Published on April 28, 2013 at 8:01 am
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