Take a ride through D-Zilla's brain

Cat Von C

Jan 18 |21:00

Last Updated on Tue, 18 Jan 2011 21:16

Here at Middleeasy.com we love DaMarques Johnson. I think he kind of digs us too but sometimes I get my Ambien induced sex dreams confused with reality. What I am sure of though is that he's got one of the best fades in MMA, he gives kids stuck in the hospital the shirt off his back and fighting makes him smile. In 2 of his four fights for the UFC he has won the coveted "(blank) of the night bonus" First with a Submission of the night against Edgar Garcia at UFC 107 and then with a KO of the night against Brad Blackburn at 112 in Abu Dhabi. I caught up with our MiddleEasy shirt wearing friend while he gets ready to fight again next week against Mike The Joker Guymon at Fight for the Troops 2. While he didn't take me up on my offer to make him my own personal caramel flavored popsicle-he did take a minute and answer the rest of these completely random and mostly ridiculous questions as he and Robbie Lawler sat next to each other at a Tilted Kilt just for our reading pleasure. Thanks Dzilla!

What are your official feelings on Robbie Lawler's beard? Being half Native American and Half Black, I grow about as much body and facial hair as a baby seal. I'm mildly jealous. I constantly feel like the prepubescent younger brother. No beards. No chest hair for me-it's genetically not in the cards.

Who wins the Super Bowl? Do you even care? Personally, I would like to see the Steelers go only cause I know some people on the team-but not really a football guy, maybe it's due to the lack of body hair thing?

Jeremy Horn looks like he rips some nasty farts. Confirm or deny? Deny. I haven't heard Horn rip ass now that I think about it, But don't catch him on a non deodorant day... just sayin'...

How would you beat up Nick Diaz? When he was asleep after an Ironman (if he sleeps), or while he was on the toilet with food poisoning. Some type of ambush and opportunistic tactics would have to be taken like in black ops where you have to swim underwater and flip over the boat.

D-zilla is easier and faster to type than DaMarques. I haven't referred to you as DaMarques in over a year, to the point where some people (your manager I think) and others may have no idea who or what I'm talking about when I reference you. How does that make you feel-are you OK with being lovingly referred to as D-zilla? As long as its lovingly I'm all yours and Middleeasy's.

Utah is landlocked. The zombies are here and everyone is totally screwed. Explain your steps to survival. Well I would head to little man's house scoop him up, and then take my Johnson mobile zombie slayin' ass to Horn's house. He has the most scary amount of ammo and arsenal of weapons out of all the people I know. Then I would probably rob some people's food storage spots and hunker down with Horn and rest of the crew like a Voltron style, zombie ass whipping crew.

What are your thoughts on moving up in weight? Would it ever be an option you would consider? Well since my disgusting fat body days when I use to fight at heavy, light heavy and middle and now welter. I said I wanted to go back up to 185, but that was until I got down to Arizona with Bader, Simpson and Dollaway. These guys are polar bears- the biggest and most violent of the bears.... me, I'm more like a koala bear.

What is your best fatherly advice? Discipline when you need to, teach often, and love always.

Chael...thoughts? feelings? Don't do drugs when you have a title fight.

Who wins the Strikeforce Heavyweight GP? I don't know... again my lack of body hair renders me indecisive and pickless. Um, let's say Fedor 'cause he is the smallest with the biggest hill to climb.

What would be worse to wake up and find lying in bed next to you: Freddie Krueger or a giant hairy spider? Freddie Krueger impersonating Nick Diaz.

Comments

+2 # synthsis 2011-01-18 21:41

I'd be willing to donate some of the body hair I clipper off to DZilla so he doesn't develop a complex. Like a full body Merkin.

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+3 # boloblack 2011-01-19 08:59

Please do.. he obviously needs some sort of encouragement to right this wrong...

Quoting Cat Von C:

While he didn't take me up on my offer to make him my own personal caramel flavored popsicle.

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0 # Cat Von C 2011-01-19 20:08

Don't do that. The less hairy he is the better.

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+5 # Guest 2011-01-19 04:57

Dzilla is picking Fedor. I think he's my new BFF.

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+2 # Guest 2011-01-19 08:22

Koala bear is appropo. They have good grip with arms and legs. submission time DZILLA!

this will be a good fight both good guys

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+5 # ThePaintedCow 2011-01-19 09:07

Gotta love D-zilla,

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-5 # SmellMyFinger 2011-01-19 16:12

These interviews suck..I mean-- really???? The Jens interview is fuckin' solid-But this shit-really?? And isn't this like the third time you guys have interviewed this dude in the past year?? Ask some credible, relevant shit-Not "Zombies are in Utah, What are u gonna do?"-What are we- fuckin' kids? Come on guys, I love this site but damn something's gotta give......

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0 # Guest 2011-01-19 23:18

Quoting SmellMyFinger:

These interviews suck..I mean-- really???? The Jens interview is fuckin' solid-But this shit-really?? And isn't this like the third time you guys have interviewed this dude in the past year?? Ask some credible, relevant shit-Not "Zombies are in Utah, What are u gonna do?"-What are we- fuckin' kids? Come on guys, I love this site but damn something's gotta give......

not many more questions to ask after 3 times?

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+1 # merlin 2011-01-19 19:02

cool dude

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+1 # Guest 2011-01-19 19:27

darkness!!! and i love the random question interviews keep em coming!

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