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The Top Ten Street MMA Videos in Street MMA History

In 1964 a supreme court justice was quoted as describing pornography as something he could not describe, but "I know it when I see it". This colloquial expression also pertains to street MMA. You yourself have probably bore witness to Street MMA, a combat sport where the athletes know little to no actual martial arts but at the same time seem to somehow pull incredible feats of greatness out of nowhere. Street MMA is it's own conglomeration of martial arts, It can take place anywhere in the world, from a ritzy neighborhood to the European backwoods. Zeus coined the term months ago in a 'Lithuanian Street MMA' article, and from that moment on, it entered the English lexicon. Street MMA is different from 'Street fighting' in the sense that in the heat of battle, there exists some methodical code that each fighter goes by, whether it's a martial art or rules created within the context of the environment. Enjoy The Top Ten Street MMA Videos in Street MMA History, only at MiddleEasy.com

 

I don't know if this is from the 90's or present day Latvia. You know it's on when a dude wearing sweatpants with a tucked in tshirt is taking on a guy rocking denim from head to toe in the middle of traffic. If I didn't know better, I would think this is from some obscure European Sega CD FMV fighting game from 1993. Serious stand up skills are displayed by both competitors as the neon lights glow behind them. Denim man loses some jewelry, goes to pick it up and sweatpants guy goes for a quick kick to the head. Incredulous, the denim man looks to hopping around sweatpants guy, does he have no honor? I bet denim man never would have cheap shotted sweatpants dude if he had to fiddle with that little string on the front of his sweats.

 

There is a generation of street MMA fighters that listen to My Chemical Romance while they trane and this gives the edge to every other street MMA fighter in the world. How a emo hipster fight club was ever organized I will never know, I thought all those studded belt buckle wearing unisex kids were perpetually in a state of browsing at Hot Topic, but never the less here we are, watching them wipe the hair out of their eyes like KJ Noons. Someone needs to tell Eddie Bravo to start holding some classes for students who need to wear skinny jeans, these guys are lost on the ground.

 

The overuse of "gay" as a descriptive word is getting pretty queer. Hop on Halo Reach any night of the week and you will hear every negative connotation of the word known to mankind. I don't know about you, but someone dodging my ghost from a splatter when you clearly didn't jump is not "gay", it is totally an exploit and I will find you one day and you will rue it you cheaters. You. Will. Rue. It. This video, however, is pretty darn gay, and we here at MiddleEasy accept that and have no problem with that.

 

This street MMA match starts out on the feet in what I think is one of those outdoor refreshment centers that are located in the middle of forest preserves. Since this is Lithuania we can only assume this might be the outside of a 3 star restaurant. I don't know and I'm not judging the environment. What I do know is that the fully clothed guy is totally out matched on his feet by the guy only wearing the tiny gray shorts. Luckily shirts knows how to work the guard and "pull out" the "standing submission" win over skins in the end.

Note: Since this video is somewhat NSFW, you can click here to view it.

 

Imagine an alternate dimension where a fighters acumen was measured in smack talk. In this dimension you fight with words not fists. The more I think about it this alternate dimension sounds like a rap battle paradise, but it's not. We are in the dimension that we reside in, whether that is the correct dimension or not, and in a real street MMA match you need to back up your talk. Green shorts guy looks properly dressed for an MMA match, I don't know if he is wearing a cup and I'm not going to check, but his mouth is writing checks his boardshorts cant cash and he goes down hard, but then comes back up and starts talking more trash as blood dribbles from his mouth. If we were in that alternate dimension he would have the heart of a lion, but we aren't so he is an idiot.

 

We are lucky Texas has such lacking commissions because this open weight bout normally wouldn't get signed in other states. Only in Texas will you get a loud fat guy sponsored by Tapout to agree to a fight with Jon Fitch's cousin. Ok, I see that the fight was taken on short notice, and I don't actually know if this is Fitch's cousin, but the dude doesn't even finish swallowing his burger before the fight starts he is shooting the single leg takedown on fatty. Looks like it came from wrestling pedigree if you ask me, and he even finishes fights like Jon Fitch: by laying on people and asking if they are done.

 

It's the ghetto zombie vs the ghetto zombie! Give these two guys 6 months of sprawl training and they would make waves in DA DA 5000's backyard league. Nice Maui Thai clinches start the fight to be followed up by a few attempted hip tosses that are blocked. The corners are vocal to work the uppercuts, then the street MMA version of Frye/Takayawa goes down for about 3 seconds in the middle of the road blocking traffic, a reoccurring theme in street MMA. The round and subsequently the match ends in a 10/10 draw when both corners simultaneously throw in the towel.

Note by Zeus: Video gets #4 spot because the added bonus of a car on fire at the end of the video is groundbreaking in the Street MMA world.

 

Only David Lynch could ever explain why Harry Potters uncle and the mom from Six Feet Under are fighting some Mod girl from the 60's with her bum friend. Six Feet Under mom starts the fight by taking on the mod girl and her friend in dominating fashion,these chicks have deeper gas tanks than Shane Carwin. The fighting takes them all over the park while they utilize throws and straight boxing. Eventually Six Feet Under mom punches herself out and gets a bloody nose from the 60's revivalist mid match. Eventually Harry Potter's uncle gets involved and starts throwing everyone around. They get tired, look at each other awkwardly for a bit and then start throwing wild looping punches until they decide to talk it out until the cops arrive.

Note by Zeus: It's obvious the old lady trained her wrestling at AKA. She scores nearly four takedowns in two minutes. Epic hips on her also, her takedown defense is exceptional.

 

This video has all the makings of a street MMA classic, the crowd forming a circle, the obnoxious bully dressed in all dark colors, the stoic red shirted guy who is getting picked on until he pulls out some serious Kung Fu. We don't know much about the evil bully, this could be Cung Le vs Scott Smith in the street for all we know, but the dark clothes definitely starts looking worried when red shirt starts pulling his pants up around his crotch and stands on his tippy toes. With trepidation he moves into the pocket only to get Lindland'd

 

The Griffin/Bonner of street MMA. This match has more back and forths than the entire Star Wars saga. Everything about this fight is perfect. From the Lyoto Machida like elusiveness to start the round, the epic sweeps from full mount to the constant trash talking, the "Say Goodnight" fight has it all. Including it's own clever catch phrase: "Say goodnight!". Of course we have to thank the official sponsor of the bout, the "gay, ugly" red headed kid's bong, and the pictures of it from John. Without them the fight never would have happened.


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