Ronda Rousey and I didn't attend kindergarten together, but I can almost guarantee you she ripped the arms off all her Barbies. Jax from Mortal Kombat replaced his arms with cybernetic limbs only as a preventive measure for Ronda Rousey. Tank-top shirts exist because Ronda Rousey ripped the sleeves from them. Arm wrestling against Ronda Rousey always has the same result -- and every diesel trucker from 'Over the Top' knows this. Chinese finger traps cower in Ronda Rousey's presence. For Ronda Rousey, unarmed combat has an entirely different meaning -- and any dictionary that tries to decipher that meaning will go to the hospital. In traffic, Ronda Rousey destroys the shoulders of the highway. In art class, Ronda Rousey broke every elbow macaroni piece before gluing it on her collage.

All of those jokes are unfunny, but I need someone to laugh at them to boost my self esteem. Let that person be you. If not, I'll choke you until you die. Alternatively you can read this quote from the Strikeforce pre-fight press conference (via MMAJunkie) of Ronda Rousey saying she won't let go of a choke until Sarah Kaufman dies.

"If I get her in an armbar, I'm going to try to rip it off and throw it at her corner," Rousey told MMAjunkie.com. "If I get her in a choke, I'm going to hold onto it until she's actually dead. And if I get a knockout, I'm going to go all the way. I'm going to try to pound her face into the ground and she's depending on the competence of the California (State) Athletic Commission to walk out of that cage alive."

Oh, don't think I forgot about killing you if you don't laugh at those jokes. Laugh or die. Those are your only options. Choose one. Just kidding guys, you can not laugh and not die too. Well, eventually you'll die -- so in the end those jokes will get the last laugh.

Comments   

 

+58 # Guest 2012-08-16 22:59

well said ronada, you sound like a moron.

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+48 # Guest 2012-08-17 01:41

exactly.So many people work SO HARD to positively push MMA mainstream & here is Rousey saying she will choke someone dead. IDIOT. STUPID.

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-14 # Cheebo 2012-08-17 07:28

Hyping a fight.
Stop getting all PC and uppity about it. This is cage fighting, these people actually are trying to fuck each other up.

"It's bad for the sport, it looks bad in the media", blah-de-blah, who cares. And please STOP using CAPS LOCK to enforce your point, your kind are not welcome here.

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+2 # Sambro 2012-08-17 15:37

What about ripping her arm off and throwing at Kaufmann's corner. That's so rude.

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0 # Sambro 2012-08-17 18:09

Now McDonald is saying he's gonna kill BJ Penn.

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+43 # Will-Kill 2012-08-16 22:59

Well, at least she didn't threaten her with rape.

Murder is ok.

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-16 # Will-Kill 2012-08-16 23:03

This discussion was mention on a Joe Rogan Podcast...which is worse?

Being Murdered or being Raped?

Rogan made interesting points and the other comedian made his points.

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+11 # Guest 2012-08-17 03:30

Which is worse? Answer is "both".

The 1979 sci-fi horror classic "Alien" was largely motivated by the psychosexual feeling of rape. And then the alien also killed you afterward.

Read the wiki page on it, it's a trip, and totally explains why people who first saw it in theaters threw up.

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+38 # Guest 2012-08-16 23:03

I know you guys here at ME love Ronda but some needs to knock some sense into this cum dumpster cunt

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-6 # Guest 2012-08-17 10:29

Yeah..calling women cum-dumpsters makes this sport look real good. Way to class it up. Maybe you are just projecting your desire to have sex with a physically superior human being in a juvenile way.

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+7 # Fatty_Sam86 2012-08-17 11:08

I'd have sex with her... what's wrong with that?

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-8 # Will-Kill 2012-08-16 23:11

Well threatening someone with Murder to hype a fight has been done for decades, is it a classic move...sure, is it dated...yea.

I mean come up with something strange and unique to threaten your opponent..Rhond a could say...

"After tomorrow, Canada will remember Aug 18th as a day of mourning when I destroyed its princess."

Is it shticky like Sonnen, sure but if your going to be wacky then go balls out.

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+53 # Guest 2012-08-16 23:21

It's funny that she can get away with saying shit like this, but remember when Mir got in all that shit for saying he wanted Lesnar to be the first death in MMA? What a shitty double standard.

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+8 # Will-Kill 2012-08-16 23:26

Well, Rhonda is a lady...ladies can get away with saying crazy shit..with all those hormones and what not.

But it is funny women can have more leeway with such things.

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+35 # Guest 2012-08-17 00:44

Dont forget that ken shamrock wanted to beat Tito into a living death

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0 # Guest 2012-08-17 10:42

umm this may sound stupid but what exactly is a living death?

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+1 # Fatty_Sam86 2012-08-17 11:09

A zombie.

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+5 # Guest 2012-08-17 11:38

Hugh Hefner.

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+2 # Guest 2012-08-17 14:48

Lol, you win...

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+7 # Guest 2012-08-17 07:00

QUIT EATING MY STRAWBERRIES

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+44 # Guest 2012-08-17 00:43

If Kim Winslow is the ref then this might actually happen

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-2 # Guest 2012-08-17 14:53

Uber dyke as well, will murder via Rousey then rape via Winslow... she looks dangerously lesbian.

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+19 # Guest 2012-08-17 02:05

"and if I get a knockout" -- if she gets a knockout that would mean she is dreaming. And I hope those will be dreams courtesy of Sarah's fists. That stuck up hypocritical bitch seriously has it coming.

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+29 # Guest 2012-08-17 02:50

Shes starting to get annoying

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+24 # Guest 2012-08-17 05:08

Starting? Where you been?

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+6 # Guest 2012-08-17 05:39

I like her but comments like this aren't cool man

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+6 # Guest 2012-08-17 02:56

This has nothing to do with the article at all, but the autoplay video adverts are enraging.

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+6 # Guest 2012-08-17 07:02

Fucking hell yes. I've stopped visiting sites before because of detergent ads blaring at me out of nowhere.

Also the ROusey backlash seems to be in full force now. Shame its taken so long.

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+2 # Fatty_Sam86 2012-08-17 11:11

Google Chrome AdBlock. It's free. No more ads on the side of webpages or at the beginning of videos.

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+11 # Guest 2012-08-17 03:02

Ronda is a C. U. Next Tuesday...

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+10 # Guest 2012-08-17 04:11

It's awesome how Bibiano Fernandez looks a lot like Cung Le in the background pic. I liked Sarah's response, much more mature. Ronda's trash talk is like women striking compared to men striking, the arms swinging are there, it just needs power and precision. The way she thinks she sounds is way different the way we all hear her sound. She thinks she's badass, she just looks childish and immature.

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-11 # YourMother 2012-08-17 05:29

Quoting Gansu:

She thinks she's badass

Says a dude she could toss on his head and break the arm off.

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+6 # Guest 2012-08-17 07:43

She thinks her attitude is badass, she could easily beat everyone of us, but acting like that is stupid, not badass. The difference between aggressive, funny, interesting trash talk, as oppose to Ronda's talk, is that one gets you pumped about two athletes fighting, something we want to see, "i will choke her to death" is something we don't ever wanna see, never to Sarah at least. Killing someone, and said in a serious way, is something that doesn't get me pumped.

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+16 # Guest 2012-08-17 04:17

Ronda, you fell victim to one of the classic blunders. The most famous is "Never get involved in a land war in Asia." But only slightly less well known is this: "Never go in against a Canadian in MMA when death is on the line!

Have we learned nothing from BJ Penn?

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+3 # aint.that.a.kick.in.the.head 2012-08-17 05:06

I was playing Risk recently, you never ever fight a land war in Asia

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0 # Fatty_Sam86 2012-08-17 11:14

Inconceivable!

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+24 # Guest 2012-08-17 04:46

Ronda's personality is eerily reminiscent of those women that used to confront their high school crush on Maury Povich. Lost a few pounds and now attractive, but still starved for attention and badly in need of validation. Ugly duckling syndrome.

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+19 # aint.that.a.kick.in.the.head 2012-08-17 05:04

I wish I could down vote Ronda's comment.

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+22 # Guest 2012-08-17 05:09

Welcome to Ronda Rousey! ft. MiddleEasy. Good lord. Is this her official website?

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+16 # Guest 2012-08-17 05:34

she is featured here a lot because LazyTheSavagge is friends with her.

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+12 # Guest 2012-08-17 07:05

Define 'friends' in this context. Bear in mind shes a pathetic attention whore and he can give her loads of publicity. It makes me think of a high school girl flirting with a nerd to get him to do her homework.
The most interesting thing will be what happens when she gets beat and the wheels fall off.

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+10 # Twinny 2012-08-17 10:22

You could call it friendship. I call it following her around like a lost puppy.

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+4 # Guest 2012-08-17 10:39

ha ha ha that so true.

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+8 # Guest 2012-08-17 06:02

Peole who talk like that (puffing their chest out etc...) Ronda are straight up scared. She knows Kaufman is dangerous. This is gonna be a good fight.

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+10 # Guest 2012-08-17 06:15

Quote:

"And if I get a knockout, I'm going to go all the way. I'm going to try to pound her face into the ground and she's depending on the competence of the California (State) Athletic Commission to walk out of that cage alive"

Ronda couldn't punch her way out of a wet paper bag with scissors on her hand, so the latter isn't happening... ever, and yes, I did quote the Rza!

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+11 # Guest 2012-08-17 06:19

This bitch is insufferable now. I've been trying to refrain from calling her that, but I can't help it anymore. The only thing I've ever seen from this cunt is a hip toss and armbar. She has Denny's boxing. If Tate made her feel uncomfortable on the feet then Kaufman should destroy her. I hope she makes Rousey stand the whole fight

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+6 # KingGhidorah 2012-08-17 07:04

Ooooh! Somebody's getting fucked up now! Gotta love that pre-fight hype.

With the odds bent on Ronda the way they are, a few dollars on Sarah is the way to go

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+9 # Twinny 2012-08-17 10:25

I was rooting for Ronda, but after this I hope Sarah knocks her the fuck out and gives her one more afterwards (Hendo-style) for running her mouth.

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+1 # Sherko 2012-08-17 10:48

Quote:

And if I get a knockout, I'm going to go all the way.

So what's she's saying is that when she wins by KO she's going to have sex with us?

Go get her Ronda! Swing for the fences!

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+7 # Lefthea D. Kick 2012-08-17 10:50

Ronda needs to fight Cyborg and be violently KOed, she's getting annoying as FUCK.

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-1 # Fatty_Sam86 2012-08-17 11:23

Ya know... I come to this site fairly often... when did the sudden change of opinion happen about Ronda?

It used to be that she could do no wrong. Now it seems she can do nothing right.

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+1 # Guest 2012-08-17 12:43

i really hope she gets a beatdown much like her little boy-toy just got.

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+3 # Guest 2012-08-17 12:57

Looks like someone got a D+ from the Chael Sonnen Correspondence School of Smack Talking.

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+1 # jwp 2012-08-17 13:14

This is almost as cool as the time Josh Barnett said he would fight in a death match if asked.

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-4 # Tom Hanks 2012-08-17 13:35

Ronda don't give a shit!

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0 # Guest 2012-08-17 16:49

THIS DUMB GIRL HAS BEEN PLAYING TOO MUCH MORTAL KOMBAT

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